Monday 31 October 2011

KIM KARDASHIAN - KIM.....FUCKING.....WHO???

Don't start me off!!!


Kim - said to be a 'typically shy and modest Armenian girl'.

Nothing, for me, typifies the American 'dream' of 'making it' against all the odds, as an immigrant - which they all are one way or the other in the Worlds' largest melting pot than...........

Kim Fucking Kardashian.


Above - frumpy for Kim, polishes nicely and your average 31 yr old Armenian female.

Fortunately the larger % of people make it because of sheer hard work, perseverance and utilisation of the skills you have and those that you are able to develop.

Not so The Kardashians particularly Kim Fucking Kardashian and her useless camera-happy siblings. I will go into some detail further into the post but the current source of irritation is the collapse of her second marriage to NBA basketball player kris Humphries, This has lasted a mere 72 days! Somebody, somewhere has done the sums and has worked out that with all the deals including wedding photographs, interviews, honeymoon/holiday pictures blah, blah, fucking blah this talentless slag has make about $19 million dollars - that is about 250 grand a day for being a nobody married to a nobody ie a 'celebrity' being married to a 'basketball player' (case, more like) which to me and most of the people that i know (i do not knowingly speak or know anybody who either buys or reads HELLO magazine) amounts to about the same thing.


Above - 'HELLO' Slagazine trumpeting the good news....

"I hope everyone understands this was not an easy decision. I had hoped this marriage was for ever but sometimes things don't work out as planned. We remain friends and wish each other the best."


Above - despite a 'no cameras/mobiles' stipulation this is how Kris entered and the 'cuffs' were only unlocked in order to place the wedding ring on the Brides' eager, money-grabbing finger (one of ten).

Kim - things have worked out exactly as you planned. You even flew to New York to get divorced even earlier but as you were not married there because you are not as well known and people in New York are not as easily duped as your average Californian sycophant you were told your would have to put your tits away and fuck off back South of the Rockies to sort things out!

Below - the 'other' cover they will not be printing!


The splicing was doomed from the start, i mean she is about 5'2" which, for an Armenian, is a towering goddess and he is rumoured to be about 6,7"-9". She would need a bloody stepladder to kiss him and say 'i do'! Although the height difference would come in handy during the nocturnal consumation i am sure............It is rumoured that she 'casted' around for somebody with that size difference so that it would make things easier to perform oral sex for her next 'unofficial' sex video release when here career starts flagging. If i had a dollar to spare that's my bet.

If ever there was a prime example of somebody 'famous' for being 'famous' then she/it has to be a leading contender.

When her legion of arse-drooling, tit-ogling (that's the males, hopefully) Kardashian, 'style-obsessed' wannabees (that's the females and the homo's) have finished salivating - have they ever contemplated FFS..........why?

Her only 'spur' to so-called 'fame' that i can find is that her Father was a former attorney Robert Kardashian, himself a product of an American-Armenian coupling. Quite why the Kardashians left the landlocked Armenian Highlands one can only speculate although the massacre of an estimated 1.5 million of its' citizens by the Ottomans which came to a head in 1915 and ran for a few years until a combination of nobody left to kill and the replacement of the Empire by the current 'secular' state founded by former military officer Kamel Attaturk. Other non-muslims including Assyrians and Greeks were similiarly repressed during this period.

There is also a 'Thomas Arthur Kardashian' listed as being pardoned during the Bush Jr term for the bribery of local officials in 1974 - whether this relates to Bobs dad or uncle?

THE TURKISH 'PROBLEM'

Turkey is a contender for entry into the EU. They are constantly voted out. Its' stance on human rights, particularly on another maligned group, the Kurds, needs some attention. Some of the voting/vetoing nations also have long memories especially as the Turkish government has been in Holocaust denial long before any of the current generation of Nazi sympathisers! Economically the Turks are looking East, which, for them, is only the same distance as West. We already have one de-facto Muslim state forced upon us in Europe, namely Kosovo - who needs another?

Below - According to the Turks this is possibly part of a Roman statue?

Above - according to the Armenians it is a partially burnt body from the 'Genocide' era.

I digress, back to Bob Cardigan...........

Bob was one of the defence attorneys' engaged by...........OJ SIMPSON in 1995.

Below - 'The Juice' Simpson.....BTW it's not Cranberry.

Above - right, some other 'juice' that he managed to disassociate himself from and the donor, lying dead in the doorway.

At that time Bob had not practiced for 20 years but, wait for it, during that period had become a close friend of the power-controlling, wife-beating former sports star! Did nobody consider a clash of interests here?

Simpson stayed at Cardigans house in the days following the murders of his wife Nicole and her 'friend' Ronald Goldman. Bob, ever eager to help out a friend, was seen carrying OJ's garment bag when he flew back from Chicago. It has been speculated that this bag contained either the blood spattered clothing, the murder weapon or both.

It could have also contained his many faces and several dark sides to his character. We'll never know.........................

As the World and his dog knows, OJ was both charged and acquitted in the criminal court. Bob sat next to 'the man' throughout the trial as a 'volunteer' due to the fact that his license to practice had expired - after all, us dispossed immigrants have to stick together.

Below - Bob Cardigan with some stuck up his own arse 'celeb' defence lawyer and 'The Juice'.

'Have we all got our stories correct boys?'

Below - Bob and Simmo ca1995. Some members in the public gallery were allowed to keep their distinctive tribal headresses on as they claimed membership of a racially distinct group.


Simpson was subsequently found liable for the wrongful death of Ronald Goldman and battery of Nicole Brown in a civil trial. He was ordered to pay US$33.5 million in damages. By the time of the judgment, in February 1997, he had transferred all of his estate to his mother, so he has yet to pay anything on the damages.

Not one to rest on his laurels and presumably glad that the trial did'nt take place in Sparta, Mississippi OJ proceeded to fuck the general public up the arse and generally rub the Medias' face in the former trial proceedings by attempting to write and publish a book taking on the character of himself, had he actually committed the murders!!!!!

The only positive review was in the LA-based 'Do'nt be a thick Kunt Weekly'.


He is currently serving 33 years in jail, nine without parole for extortion, waving a gun around like a crazy Jigaboo and demanding his memorabilia back!


Above - OJ, chokey-bound and right, said to be working on his Ray Charles impression.

Only in fucking America could that happen! Bob died of esophageal cancer in 2003. A common cause of this type of cancer is telling to many lies in courts.

Apart from OJ and his 'guilty by association' relationship with the insanely jealous and domestically-violent Jigaboo, Bobs' main claim to fame is.................................................

The founding of the Californian-ruling Kardashian dynasty - the easy way to see anything that has been affected by the Kardashians is their ruthless replacement with anything that should use the letter 'C' has now been replaced by the lettert 'K' (yes that means you, OJ, you KUNT).

The ruling elite have to lead by example, thus, Kim, Kourtney and Khloe or KKK for short. Not to be confused with the original KKK that had wished for a different outcome to the trial.


Above - 'This is what happens to wife-beatin', bitch-fornicatin' multi-millionaire sportsmen in the State of Mississippi thank yoo suh!' says 'Cleetus' (who did'nt wish to be named) a slack-jawed yokel from Sparta. ( He is the one in the foreground pointing and looking suspiciously like Der Fuhrer.

Dat's 'nuff 'o' dat workshy uppity gud-fo'-nuttin sunbich, i gots ta stap digressin'!...................

Kim, herself seems to have a penchant for the 'swarthier' type of male. So much so that she likes to film herself having sex with them.......................The tape mysteriously disappears...........gets handed to some lurid media outfit............she does'nt really want it back and so settles for $5 million and joins the catalouge of Paris Hilton, vacuous, bimbos whos' only talent is to have so rich or influential or monied parents who have lavished money on their education so that they can end up sucking somebodys' cock in some tasteless (!) motel.

In fact, Kris Humphries, altho 'White' is the only non-Black male to have had intimate knowledge of Kim. I say 'have had' we do not actually know. Rumour has it that he did'nt and that when he got his pale cock out, eager to consumate the business deal she thought it was an exotic snake as she had never actually seen one that colour! (It's an erotic snake,Kim..........get a grip, literally)

Below - Kim 'doing' what she 'does' best or probably pretty average.

Careful where you put it, Ray, i doubt that any orifice on that woman is its' original size!

When not sucking their cocks in motels whilst making home-made porn moves.........Kim likes to use Black men as sun-loungers and for scratching her arse.

I thought slavery had been abolished!

Kim would do well to respect the wishes of her huuuuuuuuuge male fan base back in her native homeland - They treat her and her 'tribe' as unofficial ambassadors for the Armenian nation and look to her to influence the powers that be with regard to the 'Genocide' and particularly the Turkish governments treatment of 'it'.

It is generally frowned on to be seen consorting, sleeping with etc Afro-Carribean type males. Unfortunately this is something that the Kardashians seem to specialise in - it does'nt bode well and when she, eventually visits the land of her forefathers, she would do well to leave the Ray J's and the Reggie Bush's back in the other Armenian 'homeland' of Los Angeles.'

Since the 'Genocide' things have changed somewhat. Armenia was the first of the former Soviet territories to declare Independence, after all they were the first country to adopt Chrisianity, a full decade before the Romans decided to (once they had killed all their own Christians of course).




Armenia is about 1/15th the size of California/The USA has in excess of 400,000 residents of Armenian extraction/the larger % of these live in the greater Los Angeles area/most have never visited their homeland or speak the native tongue.

Despite neither Kim or her siblings Khloe, Kourtney and Bob Jr ever having visited their spiritual homeland presumably because they are too busy, after all they are all listed as 'Reality Show Stars'. They might have more in common than they think with regard to culture and dress etc. I wonder how many wannabee kardashians are desperate for that Green light/card to access the American dream?

Below - proposed statue of Kim to be 'erected' in Yerevens' main square?


The Armenians pride themselves on strong family ties and religious values.

Below, left Kardashian family values.

Above, right - another group with strong family bonds are suspicious of the dark individual.

Armenians, like Americans are in favour of personal ownership of heavy weapons and are vehement opponents of any infringement of the right to bear arms.

Below - Kims' great-great Grandmother has vowed to shoot off Ray J's pecker!


The Armenian Highlands around the Mount Ararat region is the acknowledged 'resting place' of Noah's 'Ark'.


Above - ariel view 0f 'the ark' on Mount Ararat.

Most people will have heard of Noahs' Ark but little is known about Noahs' 'bus'!


For the fashion conscious - the Worlds' oldest 'shoe has been found in Armenia dated over 5,000 years old.

But will they find the matching handbag?


Above - the site has been acquired by DASH as their first overseas branch.

Below - those with enough money to buy one shoe made the long trek, with the added attraction of actually seeing a Kardashian in Armenia, something to tell their many grandchildren.


Whilst on a shoe-signing tour the sisters agreed to 'tone down' their Westernised image out of respect for the victims of the 'Genocide'.

ONLY IN AMERICA.......................................


ONLY IN ARMENIA.......................................


Without all the glitz, glamour, botox and lipgloss without the makeup and Photoshopped touches you would'nt look twice at any of them in downtown Yerevan.



In reality (the real reality) you are more likely to see this than a visit by the 'Kardashians'.


Kim and her Kardashians are an 'only in America' phenonenon in a State that is obsessed with 'celebrity' cult - Arnie could have only been Governor in California. They should be seen for what they are as vacuous, untalented nobodies and consigned to the history bin forthwith but that is'nt going to happen anytime soon. Fortunately they mean nothing over here in Blighty, no branches of DASH will be appearing on our high streets in the near future but one feature of Kardashian influenced design has been around in this country for a few years now.

Due to Kims' physical proportions (she is nearly as wide, in places, as she is tall/short) she has to have her toilets buiilt to exacting dimensions in order to get her arse, tits and lips in and out without knocking all the toiletries off the shelves and snagging her fanny on the towel rail.

Below - the amply-proportioned Kim - a toilet designers 'wet' dream.


The plans for Kims' own toilet have been used as the template for Britains' disabled toilets for the last 15 years or so, not many people know that!


Above, left, Kims' and right - bog standard disabled. Note the similarities.

Below - it is easy to see where the 'rounded wheel' for the toilet sign got its' inspiration.


MY BLOG MY RULES

ZEBO - THE 7 BILLIONTH CHILD ???

It must be very quiet in the news rooms around the World and then a press release from that most usefull of organisations, the United Nations, predicts the impending arrival of the Worlds' 7 billionth baby!

Well, you only need a modicum of common sense to work out that there is no way that this particular event can be predicted or monitered. The whole thing is a political exercise to see who can be given the birthing brownie points. Usually a toss up between India and China as they are the Worlds' most populous nations. Of course that does'nt mean to say that either will be the proud parents of the Worlds' 7 billionth kid does it?

It's Indias' turn - China had hoped for both the 6 and 7 billionth kid ( at 1.34 billion who is to say they are not wrong) and not to outdone India has stepped up production of dodgy viagra, started shagging night and day and has been deemed to be the chosen nation. Number 6bill went to Sarajevo in Bosnia-WherestheVagina. A nice little reward following the particularly nasty civil war which has had the Serbs scapegoated and left Europe with its' only Muslim state namely Kosovo!

Have you ever wondered why there are so many fit, young Kosovans over here washing cars and laundering money - they arrived courtesy of the EU - well, thanks for nothing you bunch of cunts.


Above - Chinky kids, they really do all look the same, it's true!

Below - Indian kid (or kids, it's a bit hard to tell) perhaps not the best example.


Below - the real multi-armed goddess, Shiva.


India and China might be the Worlds' most populous nations India currently at 1.2bill but we all know where the growth rate is highest.............Sub Saharan Africa. Women of child-bearing age in Chad, for example have an average of 6 kids...........is that all? The girls and women of Dudley in the West Midlands have an average litter of 6!

Below - Natalie, from the Wrens' Nest Estate waiting for a Group 4 security van to take her to Winson Green prison to visit some of the fathers.



Above - one of Natilies' feckless fathers W**** of S*****y G**e Wollaston was not available for comment.

Interestingly that the Worlds' 7 billionth kid is not going to be born in a muslim country, say Pakistan. Why not, they all breed like flies (well they do over here anyway) surely one of the poorer muslim countries could have been a suitable candidate?

Or is it because the practice infanticide on females and the ones that do make it are kept repressed for the rest of their lives? Just a thought.

Despite not being either populous or poor i would have thought that several 'celebrity' mums might have put a bid in on Eboy (or girl) in order to purchase the Worlds' 7 billionth baby. Nothing cynical of course just giving a kid a start in life.


Above - Madonna and The'Brangelinas' who, between them, could start their own 3rd-World orphanage.

"WE need MORE children"!

Says' a spokesman from the charity Save The Children For Me............

Needless to say a number of other countries have got on the 7 billionth 'bandwagon' all claiming the symbolic child for themselves. What grabbed my attention (having too much time on my hands) was this offering from Russia........

Below - Peter Nikolayev.


Amongst all the usual statistics such as time, location etc was the creatures' astonishing and i quote - "The baby weighs 3,600 kilograms,” the local news offices report with baited breath.

I'll bet it was 'baited', fuck me are they sure it was'nt an American kid concieved, nurtured and hatched in a branch of Macdonalds in New Orleans! That's 7940lbs in English about the weight of an immature African bull elephant. I mean, if they cannot get the weight right.........

Below - a child born today in the maternity ward of a Lousinia hospital.



Above - a 'normal' sized resident of the Mississippi Delta.

I personally think that the figure of 7 billion was reached several years ago and has been exceeded by several hundred million and that China has been breeding, but not declaring the births, in order to supply organs for transplants to Western Europe. I also think the Catholic church hold several million in dungeons in Eastern Europe, Central America and Southern Ireland as sex slaves for their employees.

I believe that the 7 billionth child was born in Central Rwanda about 5 years ago and is called ZEBO!



Above - ZEBO with 'Mugabe' his pet Lappet-Faced Vulture.

In order to 'do my bit for charity', being a family man and all that let me give you a bit of background information with regard to...........ZEBO.

Zebo is a half blind 5 year old African orphan. He has to ride 7 miles a day to school with only one leg, on a bicycle with buckled wheels and no brakes. Give just a small donation of £2 pounds and we will send you the DVD - it's fucking hilarious...........

It is estimated, today, that at least 20,000 children under 5 years old will die of preventable diseases, mainly diahorrea and malnutrition.

A sobering thought.